Painsomnia and insomnia

the-migraine-manual

Two triggers are very well known to me because I have fibromyalgia. Sleep deprivation and oversleeping. Both are horrible triggers. Both are predictable triggers. The main issue with fibromyalgia is that it comes with full blown insomnia and sleep dysfunction as part of the game plan, so getting sleep and restorative sleep is, well, near impossible. This is a migraine trigger. Then, well, if you are like me years of chronic migraines and FM leads to depression which causes over-sleeping and This is a migraine trigger. It seems lose one way and lose the other way. Lose and then also lose.

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Unbearable

I never use 10 on the pain scale. I save it. But I have 9 migraines. Where I make it from the bed to the couch. Where I cannot move. Cannot

I save my 10’s so you won’t hear me say I have a 10 migraine. I had a couple and I compare all migraines to those specific ones. So my worst migraines are a 9. And it is non-functional. It is unbearable. It is couch bound and unable to leave the house, do chores, work or do a damn thing.

And that is today. I am writing this to distract me from the pain before bed. Not being sure I will be able to sleep because of the pain level. Not sure how I will function on my work day tomorrow if this persists.

Losing days are horrible things. Time you will never get back. And I used to feel guilty about this but it isn’t my fault the pain peaks to a level I cannot handle. That I wish I could gouge my damn eyes out. That the pain consumes all of my brains attention. That it is all consuming. I refuse to feel guilty. Yet, I hate lost days.

It is important to rest though. Important to engage in self-care. Get into a dark, silent space. Use your ice pack. Use a migraine balm. Man, I slather that stuff on. Do some relaxation pain to just breathe through the pain.

Then just curl up and binge Netflix or what I movie. Something that requires no brainpower. I binged Daredevil today. Lay in a ball of pain and watched that.

Now, here is hoping the painsomnia subsides.